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Tuesday, June 18
ahh- one more day left!i still have one more final, western civ, then i'm done. craziness.
today i had my latin and math finals, and both were actually kind of easy. latin is usually fine, but i was surprised that i knew a lot of stuff for calc. wow, go me. =) i got an A+ in calc this marking period!! but it figures that i get that in the marking period that doesn't count! oh well, if i do well on the final i can get like a B for the year i think. my bio grade sucks, but i kind of stopped caring because i'm taking it college anyway. but i studied a lot for the final, and knew some stuff, so i hope i did ok!
anyway, enough school junk. onto my emotions about graduation...which are none! i seriously feel nothing. it was really sad, last night me and nadia were talking about how we feel a void of any emotion, whether happy or sad, like empty shells. so we were making up similes, i.e. "i feel like a mechanical pencil without any lead", and it was getting really depressing, not about graduation, but about how we didn't feel anything, which was weird. and then i jokingly said, "i feel like...chicken tonight!" and i swear i felt this warmth in my heart and i was suddenly filled with happy emotions, and so was nadia. so we talked about chicken for a while and how we love to eat it and stuff, and i realized that we had gone from "i feel nothing." to "yay! chicken!" that in itself was kind of depressing. and then we were talking about where our families were taking us after graduation, and we were really excited and happy. after the moment kind of faded, we became numb and soulless again. that should make me cry, but i can't dredge up ANY emotion!!! what's wrong with me?! goodness. i hope i feel something, anything, on thursday. otherwise that would really suck. ok i'm off for now.